


Lonely Road

by Rennaren



Category: Psycho-Pass
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, First Season, Gen, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-15
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-12-30 04:08:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12100395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rennaren/pseuds/Rennaren
Summary: Plagued with insomnia brought on by the stress of Division One's current case Ginoza takes a late night walk around Tokyo.





	Lonely Road

**Author's Note:**

> Last night I was listening to random music on youtube just relaxing as I assumed that 1 am was too late/early to try writing anything. Apparently I was wrong. When Green Day's [Boulevard of Broken Dreams](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Soa3gO7tL-c) came on this idea popped up and insisted on being written right then, even after I'd left a note of the idea for myself intending to work on it at a later date. 
> 
>  
> 
> **Set sometime during the first season of Psycho-Pass**

Ginoza stepped out onto the sidewalk in front of his apartment building, letting the door close behind him. It was late, late enough that the Sybil System’s imposed curfew on the citizens of Tokyo had long since begun, leaving the streets abandoned. At the moment though, in spite of his reputation for an exacting and total obedience to rules and regulations, Ginoza found it difficult to care. 

The evening had turned into yet another in a series of sleepless nights, and the inspector had tossed and turned in his bed restlessly for hours as the atmosphere of his apartment had become increasingly stifling. Fighting against a feeling of suffocation, Ginoza had hurriedly dressed finding himself on his way outside almost before realizing it. A moment’s debate had presented the idea of a walk as a way of burning off energy, perhaps enough that he would finally be able to rest once he returned, even if it was past curfew. And if he were stopped and questioned well, at least for the time being, Ginoza was still an inspector of the MWPSB. 

Picking a random direction uncaring of where he was headed Ginoza moved quickly down the sidewalk, the sound of his footsteps echoed with an uncharacteristic loudness off the buildings, for once unmasked by the background noise of people and vehicles. Ginoza looked around as he walked, taking in the sight of the abandoned streets illuminated by a mix of street lights and vague hints of moonlight in the darker alleys off shooting from the main road. If he didn’t know better Ginoza could have easily assumed he was the last person on earth, for all the sign there was of any other human inhabitants sharing the abandoned city streets with him. 

As he looked around Ginoza’s eyes were eventually drawn to the markings down the center of the road, which in his sleep deprived mind seemed like a pathway at the moment, one that perhaps would guide him to a solution to at least some of his problems if he chose to follow it. Leaving the sidewalk Ginoza moved to the center of the road, feeling the silence of the sleeping city beginning to sink into him, bringing with it an intensifying sense of loneliness.

Fixing his eyes on the dashes of contrasting color that dotted the street that stretched beyond his vision Ginoza continued onward still traveling aimlessly. In the back of his mind somewhere the notion that he could find a way to lose himself in the labyrinth of streets if he chose, nagged at Ginoza, who found the thought not all together repulsive. _…If I were to simply disappear… maybe I could find whatever it is I seem to be lacking…_ Scoffing lightly Ginoza shook his head, his eyes pausing in their survey of the darkened buildings surrounding him on all sides to catch on a street scanner. _…A foolish thought, if there were truly something wrong the System would be aware of it, and would register it more distinctly than with a mildly elevated Psycho Pass. The change can be attributed to the stress of work, and the difficulty of our current case. Once one has been handled the other can be dealt with as well, it’s not even worth considering the possibility of an alternative outcome. …After all I’ve proven in the past that I’m not like Kogami or Masaoka, that I’m capable of managing my Psycho Pass. …I refuse to accept any other result._

Ginoza’s lips tightened at the thought of his father, and the former Inspector who had once been his closest friend. Frowning the dark haired inspector raised his chin as he continued walking, only traveling a short distance before the skies abruptly opened, letting loose a sudden down pouring of rain. Leaving the middle of the road Ginoza hurried back onto the sidewalk, picking up his pace as he moved from under the awning of one business, to the overhanging doorway of another, trying in vain to stay dry while still continuing his walk. 

The thought of the case that Division One had been working on, along with that of Kogami and Masaoka in addition to the rain had done little besides sour Ginoza’s mood further. In spite of his earlier hope that a long walk might wear him out and dispel the claustrophobia he’d felt in his apartment, Ginoza no longer felt like walking. Changing direction the dark haired inspector set his course toward where he thought his apartment building was located. As he walked, while trying to avoid being rained on as much as possible Ginoza felt thoughts of recent incidents and conversations attempting to overwhelm him, particularly ones which had related to his failing mental health. 

Earlier when his therapist had suggested sharing his worries with someone he was close to Ginoza had laughed, the laughter a mix of ironic and resigned at the time, now the words only brought forth a deep, throbbing ache in his chest as if there were some gaping hole that needed to be filled. Memories of the past, blackened now with the pain and turmoil that had followed pushed themselves to the forefront of Ginoza’s mind as he stood in the slight protection of a tattered awning. _…Who exactly can I talk to,… that would even listen-...or care?_ Feeling his breath hitch as his arms tightened around himself, Ginoza rushed forward out of the cover of the awning. The rain instantly drenched Ginoza pressing his hair down against his skull, as he blinked rapidly against the large drops that fell, mixing with and concealing any trace of another source of moisture.

Ginoza tilted his head back, spreading his hands slightly at his sides as he let the rain spatter his face and glasses obscuring his vision. _… Masaoka and Kogami are both so determined to be heroes, or to keep their pride, or whatever ridiculous notion they’ve deluded themselves with, that they’re oblivious to anything else. Far beyond listening to anything I say… or even giving a thought to the consequences of their actions…_ Ginoza lowered his head, reaching up with one hand to tug his glasses off, a longing for a simpler, easier time washing through him as he folded and tucked the eyewear away in an inner pocket. Reaching back up the dark haired man hunched forward as he gripped his bangs, the long damp strands of his hair partially concealing his face as he closed his eyes, gritting his teeth. 

_Why does everything always end up this way? No matter what I try it’s always the same…_ sighing Ginoza let his hand fall, shoving his hands into the pockets of his black over coat as he resumed walking, watching the dark shape that lingered intermittently at his side as he passed by a street light, out of the corner of his eye. _I don’t know why it even matters anymore at this point,… it shouldn’t. I shouldn’t-… don’t…, given that it seems unlikely that anything will ever be any different._

As he walked Ginoza continued watching his shadow move beside him, absently stretching a hand out toward it. Coming to a stop Ginoza reached out further, spreading his fingers the inspector twisted his hand through the empty air for a moment before curling his fingers inward as if taking hold of a non-existent hand. Shaking his head as his lips twisted in bitter amusement at the ridiculousness of the action Ginoza lowered his hand, returning it to his pocket. _…It seems as if I’ll always end up alone._

Glancing up for a moment as the still falling drizzle left trails of wetness across his cheeks Ginoza looked ahead, to see his apartment building looming up through the darkness ahead of him. Continuing toward it Ginoza reached the entrance, taking a last look around him at the empty streets as he paused for a moment before going inside the building. When he reached his apartment he paused again in the doorway, taking in the sight of his shadow stretching out in front of him cast by the illumination from the hallway behind him. The darkened room beyond was silent, without even the reassurance of a welcome from Dime, as the husky was long since asleep. Shifting his gaze as he shed his soaked coat Ginoza’s eyes caught on his MWPSB field jacket hanging on the coat rack beside the door. _…All I really have that I can count on is this…_

Stepping into the apartment Ginoza pushed the door closed behind him plunging the room into a pitch blackness that caused even his shadow to depart. Leaning back against the door wearily Ginoza thought wistfully of the solace brought by sleep, though he still felt insomnia’s hold on him in spite of the exhaustion that was deepening with each day that passed. _…As long as I’m able to hold on a bit longer…_

**Author's Note:**

> You can follow me on Twitter [@RennarenofAO3](https://twitter.com/RennarenofAO3)


End file.
